Advice
Networking Events Are Dead: Here's What Actually Works in 2025
Business cards are about as useful as a chocolate teapot these days, and I'll die on this hill.
After seventeen years of running corporate training sessions across Melbourne, Sydney, and Brisbane, I've watched countless professionals waste their Thursday nights at "networking events" that are basically glorified meat markets with terrible wine and lukewarm sausage rolls. The whole industry has got it backwards, and it's time someone said it.
Here's the uncomfortable truth: 87% of meaningful business relationships aren't formed at networking events. They're built during actual work, in crisis moments, and through genuine shared experiences. Yet we keep herding people into hotel conference rooms like corporate cattle, telling them to "work the room" and collect business cards like they're bloody Pokemon cards.
The Real Problem with Traditional Networking
Most networking advice treats relationship-building like some kind of mathematical equation. "Attend three events per month, exchange fifteen cards, follow up within 48 hours." It's mechanical. Soulless. And frankly, insulting to anyone with half a brain.
I learned this the hard way back in 2019 when I was invited to speak at what was supposedly Melbourne's "premium networking event for business leaders." The organisers promised 200+ attendees, all C-suite executives and successful entrepreneurs. What I found instead was a room full of life insurance salespeople and multi-level marketing enthusiasts, all desperately trying to sell each other things nobody wanted.
The keynote speaker - some motivational guru who shall remain nameless - actually told the audience to "approach every conversation with your elevator pitch ready." As if genuine human connection can be reduced to a 30-second sales presentation.
Absolute rubbish.
What Actually Builds Professional Relationships
Real networking happens when you're not trying to network. It's that simple.
The strongest professional relationships in my career came from:
- Working late nights during a major project crisis
- Sharing honest feedback during difficult client situations
- Having genuine conversations about industry challenges over coffee
- Helping someone solve a problem without expecting anything in return
Take my relationship with Sarah from TagGroup. We met during a particularly brutal training workshop where everything that could go wrong did go wrong. The projector died, the catering was delayed, and half the participants showed up an hour late. Instead of pretending everything was fine, we rolled up our sleeves and turned it into an interactive session that became legendary within their organisation.
That crisis moment created more trust and mutual respect than a hundred formal networking events ever could.
The Australian Advantage: Skip the Pretense
Here's something I love about working with Australian businesses - we have a cultural advantage when it comes to authentic relationship building. We're naturally skeptical of overly polished presentations and corporate bullshit. Use that.
The most successful Australian business leaders I know are the ones who can have a real conversation. They'll tell you when something isn't working, share a genuine opinion, and follow through on their commitments. That authenticity is gold in today's world of LinkedIn influencers and corporate speak.
But somehow, the moment we enter a "networking event," we all turn into robots reciting our job titles and company descriptions. It's like we collectively agree to become the most boring versions of ourselves.
What Works Instead: The Relationship-First Approach
Forget networking events. Here's what actually builds lasting professional relationships:
Industry Problem-Solving Sessions: Instead of generic networking, organise small groups around specific challenges. When people are focused on solving real problems together, relationships develop naturally. I've seen more genuine connections formed in a 90-minute workshop on handling difficult conversations than in six months of traditional networking events.
Collaborative Learning: Join or create groups focused on actual skill development. When you're learning something challenging together - whether it's mastering new software or understanding industry regulations - you build respect and camaraderie that lasts.
Mentor-Ship Building: This one's my personal favourite. Find someone you can genuinely help, and help them without keeping score. Then find someone who can teach you something, and be genuinely grateful for their time. These relationships naturally evolve into the strongest professional connections.
The Follow-Through Factor
Here's where most people completely stuff it up: they treat relationship building like a transaction with an immediate payoff. They meet someone, exchange details, send a generic LinkedIn connection request, and then wonder why nothing happens.
Real relationships require investment over time. Send articles that might interest them. Make introductions when appropriate. Remember personal details and ask about them later. Actually show up when you say you will.
I know this sounds basic, but you'd be amazed how many "professional networkers" fail at these fundamentals.
The Uncomfortable Reality Check
Most networking advice is terrible because it's designed to make you feel productive rather than actually be productive. Attending events gives you the illusion of building your professional network while actually accomplishing very little.
The harsh truth? If you need to "network" to advance your career, you might be focusing on the wrong things. Exceptional work speaks louder than exceptional small talk. Solving real problems creates more opportunities than collecting business cards.
That doesn't mean relationships don't matter - they absolutely do. But the best professional relationships are built on mutual respect, shared experiences, and genuine value creation. Not on how well you can work a room or how memorable your elevator pitch is.
Moving Forward: Quality Over Quantity
Instead of trying to meet 50 new people this quarter, focus on deepening relationships with 5 people who genuinely interest you or who you can genuinely help. Instead of attending every networking event in your city, join one professional development program where you'll work alongside the same people for months.
The goal isn't to know everyone. It's to know the right people well enough that they think of you when opportunities arise.
And if you absolutely must attend networking events? Show up with genuine curiosity about other people's challenges and perspectives. Ask better questions. Listen more than you talk. And for the love of all that's holy, stop leading with your job title.
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